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Wheaton IL divorce lawyerDivorces can drag on for many months, if not longer. If proceedings stall, it can be difficult to get through the process alone. Men and women both face the temptation to date before they are officially divorced, even though this can lead to potential problems with their ex-spouses. There are positives, such as companionship during what can be a trying time, but the social and financial negatives tend to outweigh them. In fact, many divorce attorneys will advise you to wait before beginning a new relationship.

Spouse and Child-Related Issues

Despite your best intentions, it can seem like a slap in the face to your ex-spouse if you cannot wait to date a new person until after the divorce is concluded. While in theory, it has ceased to be their business, in practice, a jealous or bitter ex-spouse can drag out proceedings, costing you significant time in court and money in attorneys’ fees. While there are limits as to what a party can do to hold up the process without facing potential sanctions, it is very possible for a divorce to drag on exclusively due to one party’s intransigence.

Dating during your divorce can also affect your children, especially if your new partner is very different from your former spouse. Child psychologists urge maintaining a routine for children during divorce, especially younger children, and seeing their parent with someone new is the antithesis of routine for many. Depending on the nature of the relationship, it may even provoke a response from your ex-spouse if your children experience adverse reactions. It is possible that your parenting time or the amount of parental responsibilities you are granted will be affected by introducing a new person into your children’s lives, especially if that person may be considered unsafe, perhaps due to past criminal convictions on their record. 

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Wheaton parenting plan lawyerWhile most parents recognize that it is important they get along and work together to raise their children, many struggle with this concept after a divorce. Even a few moments with their ex may spark feelings of anger, resentment, bitterness, sadness, or guilt. When those feelings lead to an argument, children can begin to feel as though they are responsible for the continued conflict, which may be the exact opposite of what caring, loving parents want. In these situations, parallel parenting may be a viable alternative.

What Is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel parenting seeks to reduce conflict between parents by encouraging disengagement between parents, rather than engagement. Each parent works independently toward the best interest of their child, focusing solely on their personal relationship with the child. No ill words are spoken about the other parent around the child, each household is run as each parent sees fit, and there is very little contact between the adults. Success in this parenting method relies upon the respect for one another’s boundaries and privacy. As such, a comprehensive plan should be developed, generally with the assistance of a skilled legal professional, such as a family law attorney.

Tips for Implementing a Parallel Parenting Plan

In a parallel parenting plan, parents should avoid contact as much as possible. Parallel parenting would not be necessary if the parents got along well with one another. Of course, they still have children to raise together, and that requires at least some level of communication. Preferably, this communication should take place through email, text messages, or another form of written communication. However, when there is a need to discuss matters in person, some basic boundaries may be able to help you avoid unnecessary conflict. Ideas could include:

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DuPage County gray divorce attorneyWhile the major story with regards to divorce statistics in recent years is the fact that in most age segments, especially the Millennial Generation, divorce rates are on the decline (which should not be that much of a surprise given that marriage rates are also on the decline for this age group). But possibly an even more interesting and multifaceted development is the huge spike in gray divorces, or divorces for those over the age of 50, many of which can be very complex divorces due to the large variety and amounts of assets, properties, and debts amassed through the years. Here are some of the reasons for the increase in gray divorces.

5 Primary Reasons for the Increase in Gray Divorces

Over the last two decades, there have been twice as many gray divorces as there were in the past. This doubling of gray divorce rates suggests a trend. Here are some of the most common reasons that so many people over the age of 50 are getting divorced:

  1. Less Stigma—These older generations have seen a dramatic shift in the way divorce is viewed by both society and religious organizations. Whereas in prior decades, divorce might have branded you as an outcast or someone who did not have the fortitude or fidelity to “make it work” in regards to your marriage. These days, you will probably hear someone say, “Good for them,” upon hearing of a couple’s divorce. That is because overall, everyone is much more accepting of divorce, especially due to the many negative consequences of failing marriages.

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DuPage Count divorce attorney child custody order modificationAfter your divorce, if certain circumstances change with regards to your co-parent, you might want to consider the modification of child custody orders. However, doing something like petitioning for sole custody of your children or significantly altering parenting timechild visitation rights, allocation of parental responsibilities, or parenting plans can often be a contentious and complex legal issue. You need to be sure you have a strong case to request such modifications. Below are some signs it might be time for you to request modifications of child custody orders or other orders pertinent to parenting.

5 Warning Indicators That Child Custody Modification Is a Good Idea

While many indications that you might need to assume sole custody of your children are more obvious than others, there are still plenty of warning signs—both blatant and subtle—that now might be the right time to take legal action. Overall, the most important thing to consider with any order modifications related to your kids is whether making such changes will be in your children’s best interests. Here are some of the most significant reasons to seek such modifications:

  1. You suspect your co-parent is abusing your children, be it physically, sexually, or in any other way that causes harm to them. In most cases, if your children are found to be in immediate harm’s way, this will expedite such modification orders.

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DuPage County divorce attorney child custodyWith the average divorce rates in the nation for first-time marriages hovering near 40 percent and many states’ overall divorce rates approaching 20 percent, it is difficult to believe that some states like Illinois have consistently reported single-digit divorce rates. For 2018 alone, the U.S. Census reported that Illinois had a divorce rate of less than 7 percent. So why does Illinois have one of the top five lowest divorce rates in the nation? The answer might surprise you.

6 Reasons Illinois Has Low Divorce Rates

As with most complicated cases of this kind, there is not one single definitive cause; the reasons behind the low divorce rates in Illinois are complex and numerous. Among the most notable bases for these low divorce rates are:

  1. Safer Environments—Relative to other states in the nation, Illinois is actually quite safe. Most statistics suggest a strong correlation between a lack of safety and divorce. If you are not fearful of your safety every day, you will probably be more content to stay married.

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