Category Archives: Children of Divorce

4 Things to Consider When Introducing a New Partner to Kids Post-Divorce

Wheaton divorce lawyer kids and new partnersAfter your marriage has ended, you will likely be ready to move on and begin again, and this may mean starting a new romantic relationship. However, you may not want to rush into introducing a new partner to your family after your divorce. Depending on your situation, your children might not have an easy time adjusting to this new person being in their lives. Before you make the decision to introduce your new partner to your family, consider the following:

Factors That Determine How Your Children Will React to a New Partner

Before you discuss your new relationship with your kids, you may want to think about the following so that you know what to expect:

  1. The Ages of Your Children—Depending on a child’s age, he/she may react differently to a new partner. For instance, young children could connect with a new partner a lot easier than a teenager could, because the teenager might be fully aware of the difficulties that resulted in the divorce in the first place, leading them to harbor resentment and hold a preemptive grudge against the new partner. However, young children may also quickly become attached to the new partner, and if the relationship ends prematurely, they may be heartbroken.

  2. The Personalities of Your Children—All children are different. Their personalities often dictate how they will react to a new relationship. For example, if your child is particularly sensitive, a new partner might disturb them greatly, especially if you have not been divorced for very long. You might want to give your kids some time to adjust before introducing any additional changes to their lives.

  3. The Status of the Divorce—If your ex-spouse is not highly involved in your children’s lives due to the decisions made about child custody in your divorce, you may want to speak with your new partner whether he/she is interested in taking on a parental role with you. If your new partner is not interested in this role, then you may want to consider keeping your family life and romantic life separate to avoid burdening your new partner with unrealistic expectations.

  4. The Seriousness of Your New Relationship—You need to know for sure that the partner you are introducing to your children is one whom you intend to have a long-term, serious relationship with. Yet again, you want to minimize changes in your child’s life. If the new relationship ends shortly after you introduce your partner to the family, your children could feel betrayed or otherwise confused and uncertain as a result of the changes. You will want to maintain stability in your child’s life to ensure that they can move forward following your divorce.

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Lawyer

Introducing your new partner to your family does not have to create conflict. If you are thoughtful about the timing and the ways that you introduce them to your children, you will be able to minimize the possibility of negative reactions and ensure that everyone can coexist happily. If you have questions about the legal issues that need to be addressed during or after your divorce, call a Wheaton, IL family law attorney at 630-871-1002. The team at Andrew Cores Family Law Group will give you a free consultation to help you face any legal challenges that may arise.

Sources:

https://www.familyeducation.com/life/dating-after-divorce/involving-your-children-your-new-relationship

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jul/28/how-to-introduce-your-children-to-a-new-partner

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/introducing-children-to-new-partner_uk_5e4e616ac5b6a7bfb4c15c5d

3 Tips for Helping Children Get Used to Your New Partner After Divorce

Wheaton divorce attorney parents childrenIt is difficult enough for your child to deal with his or her parents’ divorce, but adjusting to your new romantic partner can add additional stress. This can complicate things further and make the post-divorce transition more challenging for everyone involved. In these cases, it is a good idea to make plans for how you will help your children get acclimated to your new significant other. By keeping your children’s best interests in mind, you can help them accept your new partner and ensure that your family is prepared for success in the years to come.

Ways to Help Your Children Get Comfortable With Your New Partner

Your new partner will likely want to be a part of your kids’ lives and help you out with parenting duties where they can. You can help ease them into this new role in the following ways:

  1. Choose the right place for introductions—For initial meetings between you, your children, and your new romantic partner, none of you should be given preference in terms of the environment. If your children will be visiting your partner’s house, they will likely be anxious, and they may not respond well to the introduction. If they are at your house, they might want to gravitate toward the comforts of home, ignoring your new partner. If you choose a neutral place, this could help cultivate togetherness and empathy, the kind that builds stronger relationships.

  2. Pick the right activities—Whether you are spending time at home with your children, participating in activities in your community, or taking trips together, you will want to consider everyone’s interests and preferences. If your children feel like the activities you choose are geared toward you and/or your new partner, they may only participate begrudgingly rather than building the experiences and memories you want when first starting your new family dynamic. It might be a good idea to let children choose activities and find things that you know everyone can enjoy.

  3. Do not be too demonstrative around your new partner—It is often best if you and your new partner avoid showing too many overt displays of affection around your children, especially early in the relationship. Your kids might still be getting over the divorce, and seeing you show affection toward a different partner might make it more difficult for them to accept the new relationship. Keep things simple and platonic at first, and as the relationship between you, your new partner, and your children grows, it will be easier for them to be comfortable with you showing signs of love to that person.

Contact a DuPage County Divorce Lawyer

Integrating your new partner into your family life can be a thorny issue, and you should give careful deliberation to the decisions you make during this time. By considering your children’s best interests, you can help them accept your divorce and your family’s new situation. If you need help addressing divorce-related issues, contact our Wheaton, IL family law attorneys at 630-871-1002 for a free consultation. The compassionate team at Andrew Cores Family Law Group will help you move forward with your life.

Sources:

https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2018/jul/28/how-to-introduce-your-children-to-a-new-partner

https://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/introducing-children-to-new-partner_uk_5e4e616ac5b6a7bfb4c15c5d

https://www.familyeducation.com/life/dating-after-divorce/involving-your-children-your-new-relationship

 

How Can Pregnancy Affect a Divorce in Illinois?

DuPage County family law attorney divorcing while pregnantMost divorce cases involve a variety of complex issues, but there are some situations that may leave spouses wondering about their rights and how they can protect themselves going forward. One concern that some divorcing couples may face is determining how to proceed when they are expecting a child. Emotional and psychological issues notwithstanding, there are many challenges that may arise when getting a divorce while a spouse is pregnant.

Legal Issues Involved When Divorcing While Pregnant

A spouse’s pregnancy can greatly complicate the divorce process. Some of the issues that may need to be addressed in these cases include:

  • No Simplified Divorce—Although some married couples can get a simplified divorce, this option is not available if the spouses have children together or are expecting a child. This means the divorce proceedings will be more involved, and they may take longer to resolve.

  • Delays—A variety of issues could slow down the divorce process in cases involving pregnancy. For example, the judge may order you and your spouse to wait to finalize your divorce until your child is born to ensure that you will have a better understanding of the requirements for parenting timeallocation of parental responsibilities, and child support. You may also wish to receive a legal separation before continuing with your divorce in order to allow more time for the child’s birth.

  • Paternity—When a child is born to a mother who is married, her husband is presumed to be the child’s legal father. However, if the identity of the child’s biological father is in doubt, the spouses may need to take steps to verify paternity through DNA testing or by having the biological father voluntarily acknowledge paternity. Establishing legal paternity for the child will provide the biological parents with parental rights and allow the child to receive child support from both parents.

  • Greater Likelihood of Divorce Modifications and Child Custody Modifications—One of the benefits of divorce is that it provides a couple with closure by definitively ending their marriage. However, a pregnancy could result in legal issues that may need to be addressed after the divorce has been finalized. For example, once the child is born, the parents might need to update the terms of their divorce decree to address child custody, child support, or other issues.

Contact a DuPage County Child Custody Lawyer

Divorce and childbirth are major life events, and attempting to address them both at the same time can seem overwhelming. However, ending a marriage that has broken down can ensure that your child grows up in a conflict-free environment. If you are planning to dissolve your marriage, and you need to address issues related to pregnancy or children, reach out to aWheaton divorce attorney at 630-871-1002 to discuss your options. The knowledgeable professionals at Andrew Cores Family Law Group will help you understand your options and guide you through the divorce process.

Sources:

http://www.ilga.gov/legislation/ilcs/ilcs5.asp?ActID=2086&ChapterID=59