Nobody get married with the intention of someday ending the marriage. Many people go into a marriage with only the best intentions but then life gets in the way. Circumstances change, people grow and change, children are born, careers end and new ones begin. For most people considering divorce, the marriage did not turn out the way they had hoped it would. But, how do you know when a marriage is truly over and it is time to call it quits? Unfortunately, there is no perfect solution to this problem. Every marriage is different. However, there are some questions you can ask yourself to help you figure out what the best course of action is for you in your unique circumstances.
When you are considering ending your marriage, ask yourself the following questions:
- What are the problems in the relationship and are they able to be fixed? Before you can have any hope of repairing a broken marriage, first you must identify what the issues are. Are you and your spouse in agreement about what is causing trouble in the relationship? Have you considered what your role in those problems are? Once the issues have been identified, consider if there is anything that can be done to resolve them.
- What are your needs in a romantic relationship and are they being met? Stop and think for a bit. What do you need from a marriage? Some people need affection, attention, and a partnership with their spouse while others are more independent. Try not to judge yourself too harshly for your needs or think that you are asking too much.
- What will happen if things continue the way they are? If nothing changes in the marriage, what will be the outcome? Play the tape forward in your mind. How will you feel if in five years the marriage is in the same state as it is now?
- Have you tried everything to save the marriage? Before deciding to end the relationship ask yourself if you have tried everything possible to save it. Have you and your spouse tried couples counseling? Have you tried to make a plan for the future? Are you working on the issues in the marriage?
- Is your spouse willing to help make the marriage work? Marriage takes two people. A relationship will never be successful if only one individual in the equation is trying. If your spouse is unwilling to do the work it takes to repair a broken marriage, you cannot do it for him or her.
Contact an Attorney for Guidance
Your answers to the above questions and other like them can provide insight into the best course of action for moving forward. An experienced DuPage County family law attorney can help. Call 630-871-1002 for a free consultation with the Andrew Cores Family Law Group today.