Tag Archives: Illinois divorce

Keeping Costs Under Control During a Divorce

costs, DuPage County family law attorneyA divorce can be an extremely expensive undertaking in terms of both money and time invested. As a matter of fact, most individuals who are thinking about a divorce tend to ask about the associated costs as one of their first questions. It is impossible to predict exactly how much your divorce will cost you, as the related expenses can vary dramatically from case to case. Your costs will largely depend on the circumstances of your situation, the level of cooperation between you and your spouse, and your expectations regarding the outcome.

Planning Ahead

Preparation is among the most important ways that you can facilitate a cost-effective divorce. Your planning should begin several months before you file your divorce petition. To begin, make a comprehensive list of what you own, including both marital and non-marital property, and think about what your priorities are. Decide which things you want to keep, which things your spouse can have, and which things could go either way. If both of you agree that a divorce is your best course of action, you may be surprised at how well can cooperate at this point.

If you have children, you will need to begin making similar plans regarding them as well. Deciding on parental responsibilities is usually more difficult than dividing property, but it is important to begin the conversation as soon as possible. Every issue that can be resolved in advance is one less concern that you will need to spend time and money on once the divorce actually begins.

Choosing Your Battles

No matter what you may have heard, it is not really possible to “win” a divorce case, but there are often two losers when a divorce becomes a breeding ground for acrimony and bitterness. When you are tempted to stand your ground and fight tooth-and-nail over small details, remember that your costs are continuing to accrue.

Your time would probably better spend on determining a few issues that are really worth your attention and perseverance. Once you have identified those, let the other things go. If your soon-to-be ex is demanding to keep a piece of furniture that you bought together—and is not that important to you—recognize the temptation to argue about it for the sake of arguing, then let it go. It is likely that your spouse will offer you the same courtesy over another item that matters more to you.

Hiring an Attorney

At first glance, it may seem ridiculous to try to save money by paying someone to help with your divorce, but hiring a lawyer can help reduce costs during your divorce and in the years to come. Your lawyer can help you file the necessary paperwork, which minimizes the chance of errors. Additionally, your attorney can help you avoid mistakes that lead to thousands of dollars in unnecessary spousal support, child support, or forfeited assets.

If you would like to learn more about how an attorney can actually save you money during your divorce, contact a Wheaton family lawyer. Call 630-871-1002 for a free, no-obligation consultation at Andrew Cores Family Law Group today.





Research Suggests Children of Divorce Can Thrive

children, Wheaton family law attorneysIf you are a parent, you probably spend a lot of time worrying about the health, safety, and happiness of your children. When a couple with children divorces, the parents main concern is often how the divorce will affect the children. How will they adapt to their new lifestyle? Will they become resentful of their parents? Although divorce is a difficult process for families to go through, research shows that boys and girls have a remarkable ability to adapt to a two-home family and even thrive in it.

Famous psychologist Constance Ahrons spent 20 years studying the effects of divorce on children. She found through her studies that about 80 percent of children whose parents divorce adapt to the divorce and lead contented, prosperous lives afterward. Most do not suffer permanent negative effects on their mental well-being, physical health, school performance, or social skills.

Developmental psychologist E. Mavis Hetherington’s work supports Ahrons’ findings. Through a study of 2,500 children whose parents divorced, Hetherington found that a divorce alone did not influence children’s social, academic, or personal lives negatively. Other research supports these conclusions. When it comes to raising happy, healthy children, staying together as married parents is not required.

Children Need Love and Support Regardless of if Parents are Married

So what do children need to thrive? According to child development expert and professor Michael Lamb, children need several things in order to develop properly. Firstly, children should ideally have a close relationship with both of their parents – save for situations in which one or both parents are abusive or incapable of caring for a child. Lamb also states that both parents should be consistent in the way they discipline their children. This can be especially tricky for divorced co-parents, but with communication and cooperation, it is possible. Finally, children need emotional responsiveness from both parents as well as social support. Children do not need both parents to be living together in order to reap the benefits of emotionally-engaged and loving parents.

Divorce Attorneys Who Put You and Your Family First

If you are considering divorce, you probably have many questions and concerns. A Wheaton family law attorney can guide you through the divorce process and help you find solutions to conflicts which arise. To set up a free, confidential consultation with the Andrew Cores Family Law Group, call 630-871-1002 today.





How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce

divorce, Wheaton divorce lawyerThe truth is that not every marriage will last forever, and in some cases, this is a good thing. Sometimes, people in a marriage realize that it would be better if they were no longer married. They may be simply no longer in love with each other, have grown apart, or one spouse does something that the other spouse cannot accept, such as have an affair. Oftentimes, one person in the relationship starts considering divorce before the other does. In such a case, it can be extremely difficult for the spouse seeking a divorce to tell their partner of their decision. There is no perfect way to tell your spouse that you want a divorce, but experts do have some advice to help make the conversation more effective and less painful.

Have a Plan and Remain Calm

Firstly, it is important to have the conversation with your spouse at a time that you are alone and there are not distractions. If you have children, wait until they are not around to break the news. Try to have a calm, non-aggressive attitude. The process of telling your spouse you want a divorce is often one of the most difficult and agonizing conversations a person can have. Getting overly emotional will only cause the conversation to become an ineffective fight or cause one of the spouses to become overwhelmed.

Avoid the Blame Game

Relationship experts also encourage people discussing divorce to avoid using accusatory language and instead only speak about their own personal feelings. For example, instead of saying to your spouse, “You never pay attention to me!” say “I feel lonely.” Even if you believe that the divorce is your spouse’s fault, you have already made you decision. There is no point in laying blame.

Focus on the Goal

It has been said that no happy marriage ends in divorce. If you are seeking a divorce, it is because you believe that things will be better when you are no longer married. Keep this in mind. The divorce process may be painful and tedious, but there is reason to remain hopeful. Many people who get divorced go on to live happier lives than they ever thought possible.

Let Us Help

If you are considering divorce, our skilled attorneys are ready to provide the guidance you need throughout every step of the process. Contact a Wheaton divorce lawyer at the Andrew Cores Family Law Group and schedule your free initial consultation today. Call 630-871-1002 for an appointment.