The truth is that not every marriage will last forever, and in some cases, this is a good thing. Sometimes, people in a marriage realize that it would be better if they were no longer married. They may be simply no longer in love with each other, have grown apart, or one spouse does something that the other spouse cannot accept, such as have an affair. Oftentimes, one person in the relationship starts considering divorce before the other does. In such a case, it can be extremely difficult for the spouse seeking a divorce to tell their partner of their decision. There is no perfect way to tell your spouse that you want a divorce, but experts do have some advice to help make the conversation more effective and less painful.
Have a Plan and Remain Calm
Firstly, it is important to have the conversation with your spouse at a time that you are alone and there are not distractions. If you have children, wait until they are not around to break the news. Try to have a calm, non-aggressive attitude. The process of telling your spouse you want a divorce is often one of the most difficult and agonizing conversations a person can have. Getting overly emotional will only cause the conversation to become an ineffective fight or cause one of the spouses to become overwhelmed.
Avoid the Blame Game
Relationship experts also encourage people discussing divorce to avoid using accusatory language and instead only speak about their own personal feelings. For example, instead of saying to your spouse, “You never pay attention to me!” say “I feel lonely.” Even if you believe that the divorce is your spouse’s fault, you have already made you decision. There is no point in laying blame.
Focus on the Goal
It has been said that no happy marriage ends in divorce. If you are seeking a divorce, it is because you believe that things will be better when you are no longer married. Keep this in mind. The divorce process may be painful and tedious, but there is reason to remain hopeful. Many people who get divorced go on to live happier lives than they ever thought possible.
Let Us Help
If you are considering divorce, our skilled attorneys are ready to provide the guidance you need throughout every step of the process. Contact a Wheaton divorce lawyer at the Andrew Cores Family Law Group and schedule your free initial consultation today. Call 630-871-1002 for an appointment.
400 S. County Farm Road Suite 200 Wheaton, IL 60187
123 W. Washington Street Suite 334 Oswego, IL 60543
Andrew Cores Family Law Group has offices in Wheaton and Oswego, and serves clients from those cities and the surrounding area, including: Naperville, Oakbrook, Hinsdale, Lisle, Winfield, Warrenville, Downers Grove, Glen Ellyn, Geneva, St. Charles, Elgin, Batavia, Sugar Grove, Schaumburg, Skokie, Joliet, Plainfield, Lemont, Yorkville, Montgomery, Burr Ridge, Darien, DuPage County, and Kane County, Illinois.